Relationships are hard!
I mean look at me, I'm a divorcee who on top of that went through a really bad relationship.
However, here I am being loved by and am loving a Godly man.
Yeah, I know what you're thinking too .. because everyone who I say this to expects fireworks, butterflies and rainbows. But really, this hasn't been the easiest relationship either. Like it has and it hasn't ..if that makes any sense. I guess what I'm trying to say is that there has been a lot of trial and error. Which I don't think is bad at all by all means it's just that .. I'm not used to this kind of love and I'm certainly not used to being pushed like I am either.
I'm "seriously serious", I think I will forever be in a state of ruffled feathers.
Anthony is constantly pushing me and it's not the "I'm pushing your buttons" either. He's pushing me to be better in my faith, as a better person, mother and woman. I honestly think that is the difference in being with someone who loves and lives for God and being with someone who is also so positive about life in general. So yes, I am defiantly not used to this.
I heard the best quote this morning while listening to K Love this morning:
It's not about finding someone you can live with,
it's about finding someone you can't live without.
That quote is so true but, I've always picked the wrong people. Also in all of my past relationships I've never been equally yoked either. I think in order to have a great relationship God must always come first. Pray together and seek God together (having great communication skills help too).
"Above all things have intense and unfailing love for one another."
-Romans 12:10
For once, I'm not being judged for what I've done. I'm not being told that I'm "too fat" or that I need to "put down the fork." I'm not being accused of cheating when I'm attending bible study. Instead I'm being told that I'm beautiful, I'm encouraged to eat but also to be mindful of healthier choices and I'm certainly encouraged to go to bible study.
He's strong, sweet and generous but he's also stubborn, brutally honest (about some things) and he knows how to get things done, quickly. He isn't afraid to say what needs to be said or do what needs to be done. Which is good because sometimes... I get way too a head of myself and a need a nice dose of reality. But he's also my protector, provider and he's never stopped.
Really, I've got to hand it to him. He's been sick for almost 7 months, just recently he tore his bicep muscle tendon from the bone and had to have surgery to reattach it. Not once has he stopped or complained and he still thanks and praises God. This is no joke, he's the strongest and bravest man I have ever known.
I mean this is the kind of relationship I have been dreaming of since I was a tween. I prayed for days, weeks and months for this kind of love. I prayed for God to send me my true soul mate. However, I'll admit there are times where I question if I was truly ready for this, There are still some things that I need to work on, emotional scars from previous engagements that I just haven't yet worked through. But I also know that if God saw that I wasn't ready, I don't think he would have blessed me with him.
As I said before, our relationship hasn't been all rainbows and butterflies. There have been so many tests, not just for me but for both of us. Yet, here we still are together, loving God, our child(ren), and loving each other. We've gone through so many leaps and bounds which have really made our bond stronger ... or at least make things a little more interesting. But these experiences have also helped me grow too (see I'm constantly learning!).
"Strength & growth come only through continuous effort and struggle."
-Napoleon Hill
