Know the difference between what you're getting and what you deserve.
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I will be totally honest here, I have had two failed relationships. A marriage that ended in divorce after 7 years and then a relationship that lasted half a year. I've had to learn a really hard lesson from both of these relationships. Why? Because they were unhealthy and no one deserves to be or stay in an unhealthy relationship. Period.
Let me tell you this, moving on and letting go has absolutely nothing to do with weakness, if anything it is all about pure strength. When you realize your own worth, you can without a doubt, walk away from people and choices that don't serve you in a healthy fashion. You will (and can) walk away with your head held high and not feel shamed for it. Because in the end, we all deserve real love and true kindness.
If any kind of relationship in your life, if it be romantic or friend, fills your heart with pain, you are being mistreated, disrespected. It's time to step out and away from the situation and view what is going on within. You can do this yourself, with a trusted friend who has earned the right to hear your story, or you can seek out professional advice. Either way, when you step out and view the situation as a whole and reconnect with your true self, you will find that you deserve so much more.
A relationship of any kind should never ever make you feel broken, beaten, exhausted or shamed. If it does, you are not going to have any kind of energy left what so ever. No energy, no self-esteem, no will, you will have absolutely nothing left and that isn't what a relationship is about. If this hits home with you, maybe it's time to throw in the towel, move on and avoid any further damage or grief. This kind of relationship unfortunately, just isn't going to get better no matter how hard you try, wish or pray. Simply put, it's unhealthy and toxic and you need to move on.
Not every relationship we have is built to last either, no matter hard or baldy we wish they would. I have learned first hand, that life cycles. We have lessons to learn and we can either learn from them, grow and change OR we continue to repeat the same situation over and over again until we learn. When we learn to value ourselves, we really do attract those people who know our worth and deter those people who are toxic for us.
Don't get me wrong, change is never easy. If anything it is down right terrifying and I say this as I'm six months pregnant. The unknown and what if's are just down right frightening. You know, those tiny little thoughts in the back of your head the"what if things change" or "what if things get better" but truth be told, if they haven't yet ... chances are they aren't going to.
We need to be able to step out of our comfort zones, don't keep making the same safe and easy choices just because you are afraid of what may happen. Nothing will ever change if we keep doing what we have always done. If we do,we will always keep getting the same outcome and results and nothing will ever change and we will never grow.
Life is never easy and there is no instruction manual. There will always be things that build us up and tear us apart. But the difficult things that happen to us, the obstacles we over come, will always help provide us with many opportunities to grow and learn. They will help us become aware of the things that we do and do not want in any kind of relationship or life experience.
Getting down to the knitty gritty of things, life is just way too short to be stuck with things or people that constantly hurt us. We all need have enough respect for ourselves to finally say enough is enough, let go and move on. Yes, it's going to hurt and you're going to be angry. However, in the end it's going to be OK and you will look back at this as a learning experience and what not to submit yourself to in future relationships.
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